Dear Tweetie: I feel like my boundaries are slowing disappearing

Dear Tweetie,

I feel like my boundaries are slowly disappearing.

I say yes when I mean no. I stay back a bit longer. I answer messages on my days off. None of it feels dramatic, but I’m starting to feel resentful and I don’t like that version of myself.

Have I already let this go too far?

— Stretching Thin

Dear Stretching Thin,

This happens to a lot of support workers.

Most boundary drift doesn’t start with pressure, it starts with goodwill. Small yeses that feel kind in the moment can quietly add up.

Noticing it now doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It just means something needs to be steadied before resentment takes over.

Some workers have found it helps to pick one simple boundary to hold again like leaving on time, or not replying to messages on days off and then looking to re establish others.

Boundaries aren’t about caring less. They’re often showing how much you care, but it’s important you maintain them when things have gone too far.

— Tweetie